Wednesday, March 21, 2012

65 Days Until the Licence Plate Game (but who's counting)

How can you spot a license plate game player? A license plate game player might unexpectedly:

1. speed up and drive like a madman with a crazed look in the eye, curse and continue driving normally as if nothing happened (think Clark Griswold at the beginning of Christmas Vacation).

2. have a strange fascination with parking lots of all kinds, but especially: hotels, tourist attractions, malls, major league sports, etc.

3. scoff each time a Kansas, Ohio, Illinois, Iowa, Arkansas, plate is spotted (and begin a letter writing campaign to limit the number of visitors to Missouri from these states during The Game).

4. begin a letter writing campaign to other states asking for a law requiring that state to have one plate, that's it, no personalized, save the animal-du jour, university, etc., plates.

5. ask for telephoto and night vision glasses for an upcoming birthday.

6. make a run to the 'grocery store' about 10:00 p.m. (to scope out the motels after travelers call it a night) and come home empty handed.

7. not be able to converse while in the car without uttering, "What's that one say?" "Did you see that one?" "Wait, go back!" "Rats! I think that was a _____!" "What were you saying?" "YES (fist pump)!"

8. say, "Want to go for a ride down to the Arch?" "Need a ride to the airport?" "I love the VP Fair."

9. seem a 'little distracted' from Memorial Day weekend to Labor Day weekend.

10. download multiple copies of current state license plates from various web sites and have them scattered throughout the car because they all have different plates on them.

11. have sweet oldest sister on speed-dial just in case a major plate is spotted so that we can team up and beat the Californians...oh, wait, we are purists and don't share great finds. Never mind.

Am I missing any 'special' qualities that a License Plate Game player might possess?